Donald Trump declines ESPN’s offer to fill out March Madness bracket
March Madness will be discontinued during Trump’s time in the Oval Office. During Obama’s presidency, this was a yearly tradition that news outlets would cover through a televised segment.
Trump has decided not to fill out a NCAA bracket this year and we should all be sad. Why? I think it would be quite entertaining to see Trump turn a non-partisan event into a political brawl.
ESPN Coverage of Donald Trump’s Picks
Reporter: So, U.C. Berkeley vs. Oklahoma State. Who you got?
Trump: U.C. Berkeley? They are terrible. Total losers. Those kids can’t even let a man talk on campus without burning the place down. What a bunch of babies.
Actually, they should have overhauled the entire CBS/ ESPN Selection Sunday show and have the Trump Administration pick the teams that would be in the tournament. The entire selection process would be based off of the colleges and universities with the most “American born” players. Welcome to Trump Madness Selection Sunday 2017.
Trump: We are going to have an extreme vetting process. I have spoken to the top officials of our best institutions and I will make sure that our hardworking Americans get picked first.
The Selection Process
Trumps Final Four Picks
From left to right: Trump University (Champions), UPenn (His alma mater), New York University, DeVry University.
Reporter: You do know that three out of your four picks are not eligible for the tournament? Neither Trump University or DeVry have a basketball team.
Trump: That’s a bunch of fake news. Come on Chuck, you know better. My picks will be better than Barack’s. Believe me.
Damnit, Donald. You had your chance to make this occasion into a reality tv show, and you blew it. I was excited to use #NotMyNcaaBracket on twitter come March.